06/15/2013

Last night at around 10:00 I had one of those especially serendipitous moments where you suddenly, from out of absolutely nowhere, remember something very important.  I was on the computer, editing some photos when I suddenly remembered that I was supposed to be putting on a brunch for the ladies I visit teach this morning.  My visiting teaching companion had scheduled it, and had been reminding me periodically, but for some reason it dropped utterly off of my radar until last night.  Oh, my, it would have been so extremely embarrassing to have people knocking on my door at 9:30 this morning, to find no one here but Mosey and Brigham.  Ben was going to help with a move, and I was going to take Joseph to archery this morning.  So, I said a quick prayer of thanks for making me remember this, and scoured the refrigerator and pantry for food to make a brunch this morning.
As it was, two of the three ladies we visit teach bailed on us at the last minute, but it was still a nice brunch with just the three of us.  I made blueberry muffins and quiche, with strawberries and grapes and orange juice.  And the fact that 2 of the 3 couldn't make it meant that there were enough leftovers to feed my family afterward!
The rest of the day was spent doing yardwork and housework.  Ben took the boys to play tennis again, while Kandis and I finally got our grades done for seminary.  I took the boys to get some fathers' day presents, and afterward we had a barbecue in the backyard and then watched a couple of episodes of Lost. A pretty good day!

Here is Joseph mowing the lawn.  He did the whole thing himself today, and did a great job.  He was not excited about me taking a picture of him.  However, it seems to me like it should be a mother's right to take pictures of her children whenever she wants (within reason).  After all, I gave birth to you!  And I pretty much spend my life right now devoted to you.  So I'm not going to feel about about taking this picture or putting it on my blog. This is the record of my life-- what I will look back on years from now to bring back the best memories of my life.
Joseph, someday you will be a father and you will understand the breathtaking swiftness of your children's childhood.  I need these pictures as anchor points so I can look back and remember where I've come from.  To transport myself back, just for an instant, to this one moment in time.  You look like such a big boy to me here, but I know in a few years I will look at this picture and my heart will ache a little for that almost-12-year-old who right now is still a boy.  I need to remember you like this (scowling face, and all).  Pictures are the only things I get to keep of your childhood.

After all, it feels like only a couple of weekends ago that we were spending another Saturday afternoon mowing the lawn at another house of ours.  Only you were 2 years old.  You look almost as scowling in this picture as you do in the one above.  :-)  Do you remember that plastic play lawn mower that Brigham is holding?  We had two of them, and you and Brigham both liked to go out and "help" Dad mow the lawn on Saturday afternoons.  And look at that-- you and Brigham are holding tennis balls.  How is that for coincidences?  You spent that Saturday nine years ago doing exactly what you spent this Saturday doing-- mowing the lawn and playing tennis!

In another 9 years you will be a man, perhaps almost ready to come home from your mission.  Your childhood will be over, and all I will have left are photographs.
I love you and your brothers so much, it physically hurts sometimes.  You were all I ever wanted.  The hourglass of my time with you here with me in my home is more than half empty, and it is emptying faster and faster every day.  I'll never get these two year olds back, ever again.  And I'll never get this wonderful afternoon back, either.  So don't begrudge me my pictures, and I won't begrudge you growing up way too fast.  :-)