On one hand, this makes me feel like a big fat failure. Am I completely failing in imparting any sense of joy or fun in my boy's learning experience? Am I so boring, and such a relentless task-master that my 2nd grader has to cry himself to sleep? Yes, he is touching on my worst insecurities.
On the other hand, let me look back on Mosey's day today. Here was the schoolwork that he actually completed today: Read 3 chapters of "Old Yeller." Listened to me read a chapter of "Caddie Woodlawn" (while playing on the back lawn with Sandy), and a chapter in our Landmark History book. Watched a 5 minute video for the science experiment we couldn't do because our science book is missing. Practiced the piano for 30 minutes, and the cello for 30 minutes. I think he may have done some math in there-- 15 minutes maybe? (What he didn't complete: the other 15 minutes of math, answering science questions-- another 10 minutes, spelling- 15 minutes, and listening to our other history book on his MP3 player-- 20 minutes or so. So maybe another hour of work.) And here is what else he did: Played with Sandy, ran around in the backyard, jumped on the trampoline, went to Tae Kwon Do, read a couple of books for pleasure, got all caught up on Calvin and Hobbes while waiting his turn for piano lessons, and had free time from 5:30- 7:30 when we ate dinner, during which he played nerf guns with Joseph, found a new game on my phone, played Tanki Online, and I don't know what else because I was making dinner.
It is true that our weekdays are pretty much the same. But isn't that true of even public school kids? Our afternoons are different, only similar in that we have an activity to go to most afternoons.
So what is this? Mosey becoming sophisticated enough to pick up on his mother's deep-seated anxieties about her parenting? True angst from a little boy who has too much placed upon him?
How do I respond? Hug him and comfort him and tell him I love him, and then keep doing what we're doing? Try to figure out ways to mix things up a little-- cello practicing in the garage! Math while sitting on top of the van! Spelling word scavenger hunt!
I don't know. I told him that I was listening, that I would think about what he was saying, and meanwhile he should come up with a few ideas over the next few days for things we can do or change that would make him happier.
Sigh... Being a mom is hard.
2 comments:
Gabby - You are doing a great job with your kids. If Mosey was in public school he would have half as much time to do "fun" stuff! I think it is great that you listened. Kids say things when they are hurt or disappointed that don't really reflect what is really bothering them. Seth will cry and cry about some random thing, when he probably needs sleep, or food, or maybe he was upset about something he really couldn't explain. I would wait on it, and talk about it when he feels good. My guess is that he is happy about life most of the time, but last night something was bothering him. That is life. The beautiful thing is you were his shoulder to cry on.
On another note, I really miss talking with you... hope you are doing well. :)
Oh, sweet Mosey! So young to be feeling the monotony and ennui of the human condition. :) I don't know what you should do. I do know that Elena often gets teary, discouraged and dramatic when she is tired in the evenings, and I've finally learned that while those feelings do exist for her at some level, they're not an accurate representation of how she's feeling all the time. Mosey's day sounds like a lot of fun. 60 minutes of music practicing is a lot --- waaaay more than my kids do! --- but I know how important that is to you and I think it can have good effects even aside from the music learning itself. Do you have "specials" with your kids --- a special subject you just do once a week? My kids always look forward to their specials --- music, art, library, and gym --- and it gives a shape to their week and something to look forward to. That might be something you could implement.
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